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Move along, there's nothing to see - if you have a low tolerance for being amused by news stories about sex offenders:
This is sex pest [XXXX XXXX], jailed for [...] performing a lewd act in a children's play park.
Homeless [XXXX XXXX] told police he had been "desperate" after studying the Daily Sport and Star newspapers earlier in the day.
[The prosecutor] said police were called to [location] after reports that a man had spent 10 minutes lying on his back performing a sex act.
The caller told police [XXXX XXXX] occasionally used the paper to disguise what he was doing. [...]
Mentally ill [XXXX XXXX] has convictions for [...] pretending to have sex with a wall in St George’s Place [...].
It's that final sentence that gets me - "Pretending". Is non-simulated sex with a wall a bigger or lesser offence? And "studying"? He's doing Media Studies?
This is sex pest [XXXX XXXX], jailed for [...] performing a lewd act in a children's play park.
Homeless [XXXX XXXX] told police he had been "desperate" after studying the Daily Sport and Star newspapers earlier in the day.
[The prosecutor] said police were called to [location] after reports that a man had spent 10 minutes lying on his back performing a sex act.
The caller told police [XXXX XXXX] occasionally used the paper to disguise what he was doing. [...]
Mentally ill [XXXX XXXX] has convictions for [...] pretending to have sex with a wall in St George’s Place [...].
It's that final sentence that gets me - "Pretending". Is non-simulated sex with a wall a bigger or lesser offence? And "studying"? He's doing Media Studies?
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